The last time I ran was at Ten10 Run Club at the beginning of the month. I haven’t run since then. Not even once. I’ve been beating myself up over it the last week or so and I finally realized something. Sometimes it is okay to not run.

I have a laundry list of reasons that I haven’t been running. My hip and knee have been bothering me (A LOT), I’m tired all the time, work is stressing me out, its too damn hot, etc. Are they reasons or excuses? A little bit of both really. But the reasons I’m not running aren’t really important. It is how not running, or in this case running, is making me feel.

Usually even when I’m not “in the mood” to run I know it will make me feel better in the end. I suck it up and I go to run club, or to the gym, or for a run around the neighborhood. I’m able to talk myself into it because I know its for the best. But right now, just the thought of running has me practically in tears. Awful right? Totally awful.

A lot of things are getting me down right now and usually running would help with that. I could run off the crazy, run out the anger, or just promise myself a tasty brew afterwards. Unfortunately that isn’t how its working out.

So for right now I’m doing what I FEEL is best for me. And right now, I feel its best not to be running. Why force myself to do something that I don’t want to do? I’ve been here before so I know that eventually I will get out of my running funk and get back to the activity that I enjoy so much.

So what’s my plan to get back to it? First off I’m taking away some of the excuses and heading to the gym right after work. It is time to take advantage of that Lime YouFit membership that has been burning a hole in my pocket. I’m not setting a time or distance goal – I’m just going to run. Even if I just run a mile and then hop on the elliptical, at least it is something. I’m gonna keep my “schedule” to myself so I don’t feel like I’m letting anyone down if I decide that today isn’t the day for a run. I’m keeping my running clothes in my car and ready to go at a moments notice. No “excuses” that I don’t have my stuff with me.

And what’s the goal? That hopefully the next time run club comes around I will want to go. I’ll want to see my friends, and run, and have a beer afterwards. And hopefully I’ll start to get excited about running and races again. That is my goal.

But for now, I’m just going to be okay with not running.